About
twenty years ago, I starting writing my first book on a clunky word
processor I had picked up in Comet. I have a vague memory of endless
hours of painfully slow typing. I had absolutely no idea if any of
the words I was getting onto the tiny screen were any good
whatsoever. After fifty or so pages, I bit the bullet and printed out
the first few chapters. Much to my surprise, people seemed to like
them. More than that, they wanted to know what happened next.
So
I finished the book and 'One Man's Meat' was born. It did OK.
Thankfully lots of readers gave me the only feedback I was really
interested in hearing – 'couldn't put the bloody thing down.'
A
few people had plenty to say about my woeful grammar. Nothing new
there. Every one of my English teachers had had done the same. Luckily I had no aspiration to become the next Hemingway. If people
liked the story enough to want to keep on turning the pages, well,
that was good enough for me.
So
fast forward two decades and here we are. See the book cover up at
the top of the page? Yup. It's another one. My 25th.
I guess I should probably tell you a bit about it.
I'll
start with the nuts and bolts. My last few books have all been
written with the goal of raising funds for charity: three books for First Base, the foodbank I manage and one for the wonderful 'Clark's Little Ark'
in Sanquhar.
Well, 'The Last Valley' is more of the same. This time all proceeds from
the book will be going to the Kupata Project, a new charity Carol and
I set up last year in Uganda. Every penny we raise here in Scotland
goes to buying sanitary pads for the school girls in Uganda. We have
no paid staff, no office, no fat pension schemes, no expense
accounts.
We don't pretend to know anything better than the good folk of Kabale Province. African school girls like Scottish school girls have a period once every month. And when they have their period, they need sanitary pads. Are sanitary pads available? Sure they are. How much do they cost? 50p per pack. And this is a big problem. The average wage in Kabale Province is about £1.50 a day. The price of a kilo of rice is about the same as we pay in Tesco.
We don't pretend to know anything better than the good folk of Kabale Province. African school girls like Scottish school girls have a period once every month. And when they have their period, they need sanitary pads. Are sanitary pads available? Sure they are. How much do they cost? 50p per pack. And this is a big problem. The average wage in Kabale Province is about £1.50 a day. The price of a kilo of rice is about the same as we pay in Tesco.
Have
you done the maths? Buying a pack of 'Always' requires a third of a
family's daily income. I wonder how many Scottish families could run
to £33 for a pack of sanitary pads? No wonder almost all Ugandan
school girls miss up to a week of their education every month. So it's
a massive problem with an utterly simple solution.....
Provide
sanitary pads.
So
that is what we try to do. We don't tell them how to live their
lives. We don't pretend to know anything better than they do. We
simply pay the bills.
Please
check out our website via the link below if you want to find out a
bit more about what we are doing.
Right
now we are providing pads to one school – Kamuganguzi Janan Luwum
Memorial School. When we delivered our first six month supply in
November 2017, the school was home to 250 girls and 250 boys. We have
recently delivered our third batch.
So
what has happened since? Well, levels of absenteeism and infection
have both fallen dramatically. But here is the real clincher. As I
write this, the school is home to 250 boys and 412 girls. This seems
to prove conclusively what a difference access to free sanitary pads can make.
We
now have a waiting list of six more schools who would dearly love us
to help them out. Everything is in place to make it happen – we
have a secure supply chain all set up and two brilliant volunteers on
the ground. We lack only one essential ingredient.
Money.
So
with a bit of luck, 'The Last Valley' will raise a few quid and
enable us to start helping out one or two of the schools on the list.
For
the first time in ages, I have decided to print of some actual
paperback copies of the book. 300. So eat your heart out Johnny
Grisham! Hell, I guess it could be called a limited edition. Well,
actually it couldn't because if I manage to sell the first 300 copies
then I will print another 300.
If
you would like a copy then you can either email me at
markglenmill@aol.com or
text me on 07770 443483. Please let me know your name and address and who
you would like the book signed to. Then I will stick a copy in the
post. Once you receive the book, please put a donation of £12.50
onto our fundraising page - £10 plus £2.50 postage.
Here's
the link.
The
proceeds for each copy are enough to provide a year's worth of
sanitary pads for one of the girls.
If
you are like me and prefer digital reading, the book is available in
the Amazon store for £5. You can find it via this link.
The
proceeds from each digital sale will sort out one of the girls for
six months.
Before
getting onto the subject of the book itself, there are a couple of
other things. If you feel you might be able to persuade a few friends
and family members to buy a copy, I would dearly love to send you as
many copies as you need. Go on. Release your inner sales person.
Also
I am more than happy to hit the road to hawk a few copies, so if you
are involved in a Rotary club or Round Table of WRI group and you are
always looking for a free of charge monthly speaker, then I'm your
guy. Have books, will travel. You can get hold of me via either email or
mobile.
OK.
That's the nuts and bolts pretty much done.
The
book.
For
what it's worth, in my own opinion it might just be the best thing I
have written yet. Obviously I'm too close to it for my view to
be worth much. But there it is anyway.
The
back story to 'The Last Valley' goes back forty years to the autumn
of 1979. My life was about to spin off in all kinds of new
directions. In fact it was already happening. My days as a Blackburn
school boy were done. I was on a year off en-route to the cloistered
Disneyland of Magdalene College, Cambridge.
My
sights were set on a four month overland journey from London to
Nairobi in an old Bedford truck. Which meant by hook or by crook I
needed to come up with about £1000 by the spring of 1980. An ad in
the Lancashire Evening Post alerted me to the chance of earning £65 per week
plus commision. It seemed worth a look. A phone call won me an
interview in one of Preston's less salubrious pubs. It turned out the job involved the
door to door selling of loft insulation. The boss of North West
Insulation Services was a crook to his toenails. A living, breathing
caricature of a 1970's gangster. Sheepskin coat. A host of thick gold
rings. A white Rolls Royce. He bought me pint, tossed a few papers
at me and told me to read them. They were letters of complaint from
members of the public who were outraged at the high pressure selling
techniques deployed by his troops.
A
broad Mancunian voice which would have walked into any episode of
'Life on Mars'
"If
I don't get at least two letters like this about you in the first two
weeks, you're fucking fired, right?"
And
that was that. Three pints of bitter and I was hired.
I
started knocking doors at six in the evening and kept on going until
eight thirty. I averaged about a hundred a day. 90 would slam in my face.
Ten would give my pitch a hearing. Four would sign on the dotted line
and stump up a £20 deposit.
It
all ended in tears when my boss and mentor vanished from the face of
the earth leaving hundreds of angry punters and a police
investigation. Rumour had it the man of the hour had hopped it to
Hong Kong. An outraged article in the Lancashire Evening Post said
the police were looking for an unknown salesman who had sold
uninstalled loft insulation to six residents on one small Blackburn
street. Thankfully by the time the article rolled off the presses,
the unknown salesman was somewhere in the middle of the Sahara
desert.
Anyway.
It was evening work which meant my days were free. One afternoon I
parked up my VW Beetle and bought myself a matinee ticket at
Preston's crumbling Odeon cinema.
I
had been waiting for 'Apocalyse Now' to hit the big screen for
months. When I took my seat, I checked out all corners of the large
cinema and realised I was the one and only punter. Which felt pretty
damn weird. The lights went down and napalm lit up the jungle to a
Jim Morrison overlay.
'Lost
in a Roman wilderness of pain where all the children are insane...'
The
next two and a bit hours put a hook into me which has been with me
for four decades. How many times have I watched the film since?
Christ knows. Maybe 20. Maybe more. I can virtually recite it word
for word.
Further
enquiries told me the inspiration for Francis Ford Copolla's
masterpiece was an 1899 novella by Joseph Conrad. 'The Heart of
Darkness'. I duly bought myself a copy and the back cover told me the
story was all about a journey up river into the depths of the Congo.
Which of course was exactly where I was headed care of my efforts as a doorstep
salesman. So I packed the book away and determined to read it once
our truck made it all the way to the banks of the great river.
Several months later I found myself sitting on the terrace of a
crumbling old Belgian bar drinking a bottle of warm Primus beer. The
vast river flowed by below me. The humidity was off the charts, but it
didn't botter me much. By the time we reached Kisangai in the heart
of what was then Zaire, I had gone pretty much native.
So
I sat and I read. Five bottles later in the thicking light of an
African dusk, I was done. And another forty year old hook was
well and truly embedded.
A
few weeks down the road from Kisangani, we climbed up and out of the jungle into the
jaw dropping beauty of North Kivu. Everything about the magical heart
of Africa got into me. Things got a tad hairy when the Rwandan border
soldiers refused point blank to let us in which meant we had to
bribe our way into Uganda. Our journey north to Kenya was
extraordinary. A couple of months earlier, the Tanzanian army had
invaded and thrown out Idi Amin. The road was littered with burnt out
vehicles and walls were pockmarked with bullet holes. But the people
were in full on party mode. Those few days made an indelible
impression on the nineteen year old me.
I
returned to the region a few years later to find it devastated by the
Aids plague. And then a vast insanity descended. What started with
the Rwandan genocide morphed into Africa's very own Great War. Five
million died and North Kivu became a jungle version of Mad Max.
Zaire
became the Democratic Republic of the Congo and the DRC became a
by-word for complete and utter anarchy.
Thankfully
Uganda by and large managed to stay clear of the madness. In
November 2017, Carol and I made our way to the Kabale region in the
south west of the country and set up the Kupata Project.
All
of which brings me to right now. Once I made my mind up to write a
book to raise funds for the Kupata Project, I needed a story. Well,
duh!
I
needed a story which would make its way from Scotland into the depths
of North Kivu. A journey. It didn't take so very long for a long lost
afternoon on the banks of the Congo to make its way into my head.
Why
not a 2019 version of Joseph Conrad's epic tale? Why not indeed. And
once the thought was in my head, the story of 'The Last Valley'
quickly started to take shape.
In
'The Heart of Darkness', British sea captain Marlowe heads up river
to find the mysterious Mr Kurtz. In 'Apocalypse Now', Captain Willard
heads up the Nung river into Cambodia to find and kill the renegade
Green Beret Colonel, Walter E Kurtz.
In
'The Last Valley', Malone, a Glasgow private investigator is hired to
find the missing Gregor Curtis, the son of a hedge fund founder.
Have
I done any kind of justice to Conrad's work of genius? And have I
done any kind of justice to the terrible beauty to be found in the
very heart of Africa? Well, that is not for me to say. I have done my
best. At the time of writing I only have one review.
I'm
of Mark's generation so I encountered 'The Heart of Darkness' and
'Apocalypse Now' around the same time and remember the impact they
had on me. 'The Last Valley' is a worthy descendent, and Mark the
perfect writer to do the update, because with Mark you always get
uncompromising, real and honest writing about the dark places others
avoid or manipulate. Like all his works it hooks you quickly, grips
you and doesn't let you go from beginning to end. Oh, and you're
giving money to charity at the same time. To a real, honest charity
as down to earth and necessary as the story being told. Best fiver
you'll spend all year!
Thanks for that Cally.
I
hope all readers will find themselves in a win, win situation. Even
if you hate every single one of the 54,000 words I have written, at
least you can know your purchase will have enable an African school
girl to get a full, uninterrupted year of education. You will have
made a huge difference in one life. Maybe a life changing difference.
And yeah, yeah, this all sounds pretty New Age, but it also happens
to be true.
One
book sale = A full year's worth of school for one girl.
And
that my friend means a small flicker of light in a place which has
been home to such overwhelming darkness.
So
I guess that's my sales pitch pretty much done. I hope you buy a copy
and I hope you like it. I hope you buy lots of signed copies as
Christmas presents for those hard to think of anything male
relatives! I hope you nudge a few pals to give it a read.
And
I hope we can sell enough books to help out the six schools on the
Kupata waiting list.
So
once again, here are the links..
To
check out the Kupata Project.
To
order an actual, physical book call or text me on 07770 443483 or
email me on markglenmill@aol.com.
I'll send out a signed copy and once you receive it you can pop a
£12.50 donation onto our fundraising page.
If
you prefer your reading digital, the book can be found in the Amazon
Store right here.
A great way of helping those in need and you get a book written by a cracking writer. Win win.
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